Life with BS: In Loving Memory

Frances Dee Nelson April 21, 1961 ~ October 28, 2010

As I sit here typing this up it occurs to me that I don't have that many memories of Dee. At least not until about 7 years ago. I'm not sure if it is because he was so much older than me or if maybe my mind is just blank right now. I miss him and I wish our relationship had been better through out the years.

Memories I have of Dee...

I remember he was there when I was born. Actually, I don't remember that, but I do remember hearing him tell me about it. He was 15 and apparently as anxious as a father to be. He was very proud to have a new little sister.

I remember him staying up all night and creating a solar system for one of my science projects in school. It was enormous! I had to have help carrying it. I wish I could remember what grade he got me for it.

I remember when the majority of these pictures were taken. Mom and I had planned a trip to Oregon in August/September 2003 to see Dee and Katrina. We hadn't seen them for a few years and our relationship was mending. We had such a great week driving up and down the coast and seeing how much their lives had changed. I am so grateful that when his life came together he and Katrina had found a place to call home where they could be safe and happy together.

Honesty this week has some of the best memories I have of my brother. One of the nights we were there we walked out to the ocean from the camp grounds where they lived and worked. The wind was blowing so hard and it was really cold. Dee was determined he was going to light a fire for me on the beach. There was no way you could light anything in that wind. It took a while but he finally gave up. It was funny to watch him try though.

Another night we sat inside their house watching Pink Floyd concerts and listening to Robin Williams and George Carlin do stand up. We had brought some comedy CD's with us for the drive to Oregon and listened to them while driving up and down the coast that week. He loved to laugh and his laugh was distinctive. When he was laughing you knew it was him and that he was enjoying himself.

He was just like Grandpa. He loved to build things. These are some of the places he spent the last 10 years of his life building. They are part of the legacy he leaves. As long as these buildings remain we will have a part of who he was and what he loved.

Mom took these pictures when Katrina was putting salve on his sores. In true Dee fashion he had to give the camera at least one bird so why not two or three.

Mom tells the story of this picture better than I. Could be because she was there to take the picture. Since she's not here I'll have to do it.

You see the little blue horns sticking out from behind his head??? Well, that is a butterfly Kat had on the wall. You can't tell that from this picture though. All Mom could see were the wings sticking out like horns. She just had to get a picture. It was part of the sense of humor that both Mom and Dee shared.

When Mom called to tell us that Dee was being placed on Hospice we decided we would rather celebrate his life while he was there than to go out after. These are pictures of our last visit. We are so grateful to have been able to spend just a little more time with Dee before he passed. Brian and Dee had only met once before this visit.